-got a new job, quit that silly sex shop. It was fun while it lasted, and i always have some insane stories, but the people who ran it were just bad bad people, and i hated working for them. I feel kinda bad for getting megan involved with that crazy shit, but how was i to know it would just keep getting crazyer and more ridic with every passing moment.
-My new job is amazing. Sometimes I am afraid that I don't know enough and I am gonna screw up any second, but luckily, jonna is the best, and is always there for me. Its the best paying job I have ever had, and I want to do my best, not just because it pays well, but because i want to really help jonna and do my best to make her proud.
-My car, the great lovey blu has dies, after throwing in grand after grand after grand to keep fixing all the different things that kept breaking down, we finally have givin up and i will be looking into loans and such this summer so I can possible get a new car by august...I really loved that car, but its just way too expensive to keep fixing. gonna try to get a old cheap reliable, (and cheap to fix) car to get me to point A B and C.
-Men are a waste of time. Always have been always will be.If something falls in my lap great, if not, good, I have lots of other things I want to get done at this time in my life
- I have planned an insanely busy year fr myself But I'm ready and exited to do it.
-Coachella changed my life. I will be going every year for the rest of my life, no questions asked.
-lost some weight, wanna loose more.
-want to do more on the acting front, I've just been so busy getting out of debt I haven't been able to do the things I want to do for my career for a few years, but at the end of the summer, watch the fuck out. I plan on being 90% debt free before I start CSUN.
ok a brief thing on 1984 so i can start reading it again without disturbing what i wanted to say about it the first time.
So what really stuck me about this after the first time reading it is the complete dissolution of logic, Because , double think exiting mean logic does not. after being told something enough, and having the world so unstable, and facts having no basis in this world, you forget how to think for yourself and make your own conclusions and decisions, they end up making you understand two contradictory things at once.
I mean logic seem like such a natural instinct, something that always has and always will be. there is no way to refute pure logic, only there is one way i suppose, fear and lies. But to think that it seems totally plausible with the correct amount of these two things, even the most basic and undeniable things can be wiped out for profit.
It also inspired my book idea about the doubble think that goes on in religious communities between, their religion, their perception of what i means to be an american, and the reality we live in.
but with and emphasis about what implications being religious has on the implications of being an american. america being ""founded on freedom of religion" and such.
it just completely blows my mind to think that those who write history, literally write history,and who is to say otherwise? we need those who say otherwise. and that we have to have people to check and double check and doubt and everything, dissent is the highest form of patriotism. even if that means we need conspiracy nuts and shit like that.
Also the idea of new speak wanting to wipe out connotation from language, so it would no longer be expressive, and that lead me on a journey of people who are afraid of people form other cultures because they don't understand them, and that differences in language crete two different reactions from people, people who say "learn MY language" and those who say "i wish i knew your language too", those who run the world in 1984, and those who write the book 1984 in our world. and the implications the book has , just simply by being written and existing, creates circumstances in the world that help fight off that kind of world.
those in control must be held accountable, otherwise they will not just rule our rules they will rule our mind.
anyway, pretty much a short bullet point thing, prolly will expand later but gonna get back to work nw.